“What is mindfulness?”
“Why should I meditate?”
“I don’t like to be still. How the hell can that help me?”
I’ve heard all of this and more when I assign a form of meditation to my clients. Many do not understand the benefits of simple daily practice and feel it can be a waste of time. The truth is, you are wasting your time by fixating on everything but the present.
Last week a client asked me “What’s the difference between mindfulness and meditation?”
“What a great question. In simplistic form, all meditation is some form of mindfulness, but not all mindfulness is meditation.”
Mindfulness can be a simple way of being aware. Being present. The best way to be mindful in everyday life and conversations is to be actively curious. Being curious about what someone is saying, be curious about your minds reaction or simply being curious about what the inspiration is behind a songs lyrics. Mindfulness is staying in the Now, meditation can be a tool to get you to the Now.
Clients ask me all the time, if they have to sit on the ground and stay quiet or still for an hour. The answer is no. There are many forms of structured meditation (I personally recommend a course at your local Transcendental Meditation Center or check your local area for a Vipassana retreat), but for beginners there are easy steps you can do daily.
One of the simplest ways to begin is counting backwards slowly (you can use your breath for this if you like). This process can be very enlightening despite its ease of use. I recommend starting with a low number like 50 and see how it goes. Slowly progress to higher numbers, but check in and make sure you are counting slowly.
One of my favorites is “Shower Mediation.” This takes your simple shower routine and turns it into a wonderful practice. All you have to do is concentrate on what you are doing while you are in the shower. Feel where the water is hitting your body. Can you feel the suds down your back? See the light reflecting off the tiles or windows. How does the smell of your shampoo differ from your soap? I suggest do this in silence, not playing any music and to place a sticker or dot in your shower so you remember daily to practice.
Lastly, washing your dishes. This is exactly what you are thinking, similar to the shower mediation, you just concentrate and be curious about your dishes (yes, your dishes!). Think about the water temperature, the aroma of the dirty dishes mixed with soap, the heaviness of the plates, etc.
These daily practices can have a big life long change on your world and how you interact with it. Once you become more aware of the Now and being present, you will see things for how they really are and be more engaged in life. This aids in lessening depression and anxiety and can for sure make you a better lover.
